Zen

Followers! Man what a week.  I am pooped!  Lots to report so here is the short and sweet. Peddle on.

We left off with me coming home from Colorado (two and a half hours late I must mention. Wind issues but made for a fun bumpy flight [I like turbulence]). Late meeting the next day at work. Friday was work. 

Saturday, early morning ride! Into the Hills, Out to the Ocean, a 45 mile ride with hills and climbing. The first fifteen were rough.  Right when we started some guy, not from Team San Diego, rode by and said your back tire is low. I went into a tizzy.  I am still new.  So I was riding thinking, “is it low, is it riding rough, am I dragging?” He put my mind into a moment of light panic because I didn’t want to get a flat, didn’t want to exert more energy than needed and didn’t want to have any other unforeseen bad event because my tire was low. But after some thought and more riding, I realized it was not low, it felt just fine. Moving on, I was kind of upset I let that guy get to me. Lesson learned, take advice from other bikers, but follow your gut. BUT…. Got to ride on the freeway for all of a half mile.  Crazy fun!!!!  After rest stop one, I moved out in the front side of the pack and followed TRL Doug. We went through Rancho Santa Fe and it was just beautiful. The air smelled sweet and the weather was great, but I never got to a Zen spot that I speak so frequently of.  But we got some speed and the rolling hills were fun to navigate.  They were also very narrow! Doug was good to follow. I liked his speed.

Lunch (a breakfast sandwich from Starbucks) and then hit the road again.  By this time I had met some new people. David, cool guy I had met previously from TKB, but didn’t get a chance to talk much to him. Romi, fun girl who matched my speed and was fun to ride with and talk to. But now we are heading to the ocean and the infamous Torrey Pines Hill. Yeah, not feeling it today. Kicked my ass and I was a sweaty mess. To be honest followers, at this point I was just not having the ride.  The ride and I were not jiving and I was done. I just wanted to get to the finish line.  We rode through UCSD campus on the way back. Crappy shifting. Bad stops. Near misses. Frustrated. Move on to the final slow gradual hills back to the starting line and I was just cursing under my breath. Slowing, stopping, right turn, glass. Every call out was uttered in a not so happy tone.  I think I was just zapped.  I had taken a week off from all exercise and was dehydrated and hungry. 

Into the Hills, Out to the Ocean by vazguy at Garmin Connect - Details

I called my buddy David. What is wrong with me? Why am I off? He reminds me we all have our off days and that I should go on the ride tomorrow. We chatted for a while and I think I figured out why the ride was bad, but not ready to share that just yet. (Ricky, check your journal) That night was dinner with a….. person. Names not being used, I will say it was not a bad dinner; I cooked so it was amazing :) but it actually was not a bad night. Say it with me, one for the pen and paper version of my blog chronicle but using this as a place holder to remind me to go to the journal at this moment when I go through this years down the line.

Woke up Sunday at 7. 730 rolls around and I say, do it. Go for a ride.  Make it there just in time for the safety speech. Coronado Bayshore Loop. An easy 25 mile ride around the bay. Started out great. Tammy led a good solid 18 mph pace. Met Ken, some others whose names are just escaping me right now, and some familiar faces were there. More nice talks with Romi. And followers, I was feeling good. Today felt different. I had food in me, rest, and maybe some reflection time.  We round the bay down by Chula Vista. Now I am feeling the Zen. I looked out at the bay, bikers, joggers, kids and families around enjoying a gorgeous San Diego day and I felt good. I was happy. I also have a revelation. Biking fulfills me with what has been absent from my life for years.  I used to dance all the time (ballet). It was my exercise and life. I loved it. But after a four surgery injury and years off, I never went back. What I was feeling on my bike was similar to dance.  My body was challenged and getting fitter, stronger. A nice observation and realization for me to make. Now we are on the silver strand. Tammy is deceptive…. That woman took off.  She is a speed demon and I LIKE IT!!!! I kept up with her. I got to my personal best of 25 MPH while peddling! That was an incredible accomplishment and I was so proud of myself! How cool to fly down the strand so fast at your own doing! Tammy, let’s do that again, anytime. 

Tammy flying ahead of us all

Starrs, The Noiseless Tenor. Followers, I have been sad recently, we have discussed this. Or rather, I have blogged it. But at that moment, I was at peace. It was a beautiful moment that words cannot describe but I wish upon everyone that feeling. 

We push through Coronado and all meet up at the ferry. Then the fairies got on the ferry (Ha, I told you my humor was bad) and we went back downtown.  Logan and I talked, which was nice. Logan, if you remember is my tent mate.  I like the guy. He is cool and fun. I am glad to call him a friend and know I have one item out of the way for ALC.

Coronado Bayshore Loop by vazguy at Garmin Connect - Details

Made it home and ate and started to feel better.  Work. Than off to the gym with Manny for shoulders. “Manny, take it out on me and don’t hold back.” Oops.  Maybe I shouldn’t have given him that challenge. He killed me! My shoulders hurt for three days, in a good way. :) Thanks man!

After the gym, I come home to this,

 

My landlord installed landscape lighting, and lit the big (anyone know who this is) statue in my front yard. I love this statue. I know it has to do with either Buddhism or Hinduism, but I love it. Very peaceful and it looks nice lit up.

Monday, work and some much needed home time :) What was cool was seeing the statue. When I walked up to my place, I realized I have my sanctuary, and I love it. My little cottage with no shared walls and quiet neighbors. It is peaceful and calm here and I love it.

Tuesday, work and back to the gym. TKB with Bobby. Fun class, he was a great teacher. Bis and tris by myself. First time doing that without Manny. It was nerve racking going up with all the muscle guys, but as Manny reminded me, they all started somewhere.

Wednesday, work and…. TKB and Emily pulled Ray and I onstage!!!! Super cool. And guess what. I loved it!!  It was because it was like teaching dance again. And I miss that.  I had already talked to Emily about being certified as a TKB instructor but I think this was the push I needed to realize I want it.  So yeah, come May, I will start practicing so that come June July, I can be certified as a Turbo Kick Box Instructor! Thanks Em and Bobby for agreeing to help me get there :)

Thursday, today. Followers, let’s talk. The day started great. Work, not bad. Took Body Pump. Feel good. But today was a unique emotional day. Today is a joyous and sad day. Here’s why. My little buddy was to be born today. He was not though. Crap, this is hard to write. Tears are in my eyes but here goes, this is the journey. My little buddy, what I considered to be my adoptive nephew was born in November. He shared a few hours here with his mother and father and then passed on. I never met him. But I love him. And though I never met him I feel him. He is with us. Regardless of spiritual beliefs, we are all comprised of energy. And energy never goes away. I made it through the day ok, but when I got home and saw the statue lit up beautifully, I stopped.  I looked at the sky. There were some clouds, and some stars. The air was perfect, still with a gentle breeze every so often. And I felt him. He is a part of us, and a part of my journey. That was the joyous part. I was happy to think of him and feel his love. Though I ride for those impacted by HIV and Ricardo, I will ride for him and know that as the days are rough, and I feel so tired, he is with me and seeing the coast of California, as he gives me the gentle push I know I will need. So buddy, my simple note to you. 

You are loved. Your adopted Uncle, Ricky

"In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks." -- John Muir